Little Sister

Dear Callie,
I've never had a big sister, let alone an older sibling, which means I've never really known the responsibilities of my job: do I buy you lots of presents, fight with you, give you advice, lend you my clothes, ignore you, laugh with you? These three months away have given me a long time to think about what it means to be your older sister. It means that I love you unconditionally. It means that we can talk about anything, and that I always have someone to hug when I'm feeling sad. Most of all, it means I miss you so much that the thought of being away for seven more months is almost unbearable. I miss tiptoeing into and out of our room in the dark so as not to wake you, I miss the way you sometimes talk in your sleep, I miss the way your face lit up when I showed you a new Taylor Swift song, and the way you can talk and talk for hours. I miss seeing you dance around the house, and I miss the noise you make when you tap your feet under the counter. I miss doing your hair and makeup when you dressed up as a princess, and buying you all the silly little presents that mom never would. I miss you speaking non-stop Spanish to me even though you knew I didn't understand a word, and I miss the way you laugh and laugh at your own jokes. I miss holding your hand in parking lots and helping you play computer games. Most of all, I miss you calling me "Shawny" and the way, when you smiled at me I knew without a doubt that you loved me.

I know I'm not here for you this year, and I'm sorry for that. You have grown up so much already in the time that I've been gone! Third grade was a big year for me: I learned my times tables, my dream was to live on a ranch with my best friend with lots of horses, I earned my black belt, and (how could I forget) you were born!  I always thought of myself as a leader, but looking back I tried so hard to fit it that I almost lost myself along the way. You're already much braver than I was, and I'm so proud of your ability to stay true to yourself even when everyone else is doing something else. There are things I'd wish someone had told my eight year old self (or rather, I wish I had listened to some of the things people told me!). I may not be there for you whenever you need me this year, but here is some advice that will hopefully get you through some of those sticky situations...

It's okay to make mistakes, just make sure to learn from them.

Mom and Dad are usually right.

Telling the truth makes life a lot easier, even if it doesn't seem like it will in the moment.

Listen to whatever music YOU like, not what your friends say is cool.

Don't be afraid to sing and dance in front of people.

Always do your homework and try your best on tests, but if you occasionally get things wrong it's OKAY.

Watch Disney movies as often as possible.

Read often, but don't forget to go out and live in the real world too.

Smile at people even if they're not one of your friends.

Boys are silly -- don't ever let one of them make you feel bad about yourself. You are perfect just the way you are.

Practice the splits everyday -- at least one of us kids needs to be semi-flexible!

Try new things and seize opportunities. I always wish I had been in theater and played softball, but was too scared to try!

Believe in fairies.

And always remember that your big sister loves you <3.

I miss you so much Callie-Boo.
Lots and Lots of Love from Marbella,
*Shawny* xoxo